THE DIARY OF Z

Here is my suggested wish list for celebrities stepping into 2010…

Madonna: Stop giving young boyfriend Jesus a $10,000 monthly allowance and adopt a dozen more babies instead.

Rakhi Sawant: Find a maid (male) in Mumbai on reality TV.

Kareena Kapoor: Ditch ‘size zero’, so Saif has more surface area of his beloved to explore.

Sachin Tendulkar: Organise more auction workshops for charity than play the actual game. Keeps him ‘fit’ that way.

Shashi Tharoor: Stop being a ‘Twitter minister’ and start being out and about.

Nicole Richie: Three resolutions - eat something, eat something, eat something.

Mukesh and Anil Ambani: Smoke the peace pipe even if it contains the harmful petrol fumes.

Jude Law: Not to get back together with Sienna Miller for the fifth time and instead find a woman to date with less of a penchant for shacking up with co-stars.

Shah Rukh Khan: Stop making news based on caste, creed or colour.

Paris Hilton: To get a real job other than just being a party girl and lose the catch phrase, “That’s Hot” because everyone is sick of hearing it now.

Ashutosh Gowariker: Start cracking jokes at himself, so others don’t.

Paul McCartney: Perform thorough background checks on all future girlfriends and start work on new album to increase cash flow.

Salman Khan: Find a surrogate mother and end all speculation regarding Katrina Kaif. He is no Salman Rushdie.

Kevin Federline: Buy condoms in bulk and actually use them, and also get a real job other than just being Britney’s ex-husband.

Britney Spears: Wear underwear on a daily basis, especially underneath dresses in public.

Gul Panag:  Replace frequent tweeting with regular conversations and stop calling up friends from an unknown number and offer them loans.

Amitabh Bachchan:  Stop blogging, because the more he blogs, the more enemies he makes.

Cameron Diaz: Continue with the same New Year resolution of last year: stop smoking, stop shopping and start wearing a bra.

After blogging directly from the Wordpress account on the web and only recently from my smartphone, I am now blogging from my desktop blogging application, Windows Live Writer.

The best part of this is that you can write offline and post it by setting a publishing date. What’s more, you can add pictures, maps, videos, and tags in one seamlessly integrated tool.

Will let you more about this as I continue to blog from this platform. If you have something to share, feel free to leave your comments.

All this while, I thought Cellspin was my solo Symbian plug-in for E71 to blog.

But I was wrong.

Here comes a freeware called WordMobi that allows you to blog on Wordpress, including self-hosted sites like mine, using the Wordpress platform.

Not only is the upload quick, you can also add tags, photos, videos and personalise. You can make certain words in bold and italics for instance.

Just Google it and you shall get the download link. If you find a better app for Symbian, feel free to share.

If you are a Nokia smartphone buff, here is one cool app you must not miss…Free-isms: runs your apps in comic blurbs like in a conversation; allows you to send fake sms from say a celebrity; schedule an sms and also flash sms where your message will flash on receiver’s screen and vanish.And yes, it’s free. So make the most of it. Just google it and you will get the download link. Happy messaging!Will let you know of more apps in my future posts. If you know of any, feel free to share in Comments.

Who indeed? And does she know about it! She is a fine actress, a busy mother, a wife, a Peace representative….. which of these would suffer if she put up for the Presidency?

How much world and international experience in all things political has she? What does Sarah Palin think about this likely candidate? Could it be a contest between two Amazon lady warriors? Might she succeed where Hillary Clinton failed? (Although in her defence she was unlucky having such a charismatic opponent).

The plot gets curiouser and curiouser! Hold your breath…..
2012 could be a vintage year for the Media!

Contributed by Barbara Turner

In Kerala the answer is yes. Seven bus operators voted in favour. In their defence, they are thinking of students and a suggested decrease of their fares but an increase of minimum fare to Rs 5 for other passengers.

The problem is that an increase might reduce the number of travellers and then jobs will be in jeopardy. For long journeys, the drivers will be safe as they are needed. But if buses run with fewer passengers on short routes, the operators might use fewer buses and students will suffer too.

What to do?

Talks will help but maybe end in stalemate. Will it be checkmate to the drivers or the operators? Will the students be pawns in their hands?

Contributed by Barbara Turner

Read about Kareena Kapoor’s footwear fetish and realised that fetishes vary according to age, sexual orientation, fame, notoriety.

Mine are boring. I make lists and then lists of lists. I check the door lock twice and then return to check if I checked.

Buying exotic shoes makes more sense. I wish I could.

The latest are imitation python. These boots are not made for walking. They are showstoppers. Heads turn, women drool, men smile indulgently, love them only if they don’t have to pay.

The wearer stands six inches taller and ten feet higher in her own esteem. Boyfriends tolerate their girl looking down from a great height and the next day, upwards, adoringly, wearing favourite flatties.

But there’s nothing like a dame in boots, especially if she’s Kareena Kapoor.

Contributed by Barbara Turner

It’s the 20th anniversary of the fall of the Berlin Wall in 1989.

I have been there (1995).

It looks just like an ordinary stone weighing about 2 kilos resting on my mantelpiece in pride of place. But it is special. Not just because I carried it in my rucksack for 1000 miles by train, bus, and on foot. Not just because I “stole” it and only I know that.

It is special because it was part of the infrastructure of the Berlin Wall, still lying on the ground, six years after it was torn down by joyous East and West Berliners. And I searched and found it, determined to own part of what had been and now, no more. Once, guards had trodden it, fired from it, killed from it.

I stole a little piece of history, and called it my own.

Contributed by Barbara Turner

I wonder why it has only just surfaced that American Continental Airlines were not as thorough frisking the former Indian PM, Dr. Abdul Kalam last April as they should have been.

It is possible that he might have been ‘ambushed” on the short distance he had to walk. Considering that  no one should be exempt for obvious reasons didn’t seem to be the airline policy.

Searching  heels of  men’s shoes is regular but not, in my experience, ladies shoes.

In contrast, security at Indian temples is most strict probably because of the large number of visitors.

Although time consuming, it is in our own interests. Temples lost to bomb outrage are irreplaceable but then so are travellers everywhere.

Contributed by Barbara Turner

I have been using E71 for over two months now, after having used iPhone previously. Here is why I like E71. To begin with, it’s not a touchscreen. Adept at typing away till eternity, I find this to be my single biggest reason for using E71. Not that Iphone isn’t good. But then, I find iPhone to be doubly expensive. Two, the volume isn’t really a lot in an iphone. On the other hand, E71 can be too loud, too.

But first, the BIGGEST MINUS…

A very logic-heavy user interface. It will take you a good part of a week to get used to all its functions and how to enable and disable them. This is also because the most obvious applications are in the most un-obvious title folders. Goes to show that the guys at Nokia definitely need to undergo English language courses.

And now, the PLUSES…

1. The Nokia Ovi store has scores of funky applications just like the Apple store is for the iPhone. Besides, there are many more third party application stores like getjar that offer thousands of Nokia E71 applications, be it education, utility or entertainment.

2. The full QWERTY keypad is the most comfortable for me. Though people with bigger hands find it difficult, it’s perfect for skinny types like me. Works like a charm.

3. Looks business class with that shiny stainless steel case.

4. Nokia Email enables HTML push emails and looks real good and easy on the eye. And it’s functionally convenient and fast, too.

5. Some applications make E71 a true winner and deserve a special mention. Skyfire for its fantastic web browsing ability that is better than the preloaded web utility of the E71. Mobipocket ereader allows you to read ebooks and 10,000 English books are free to download and read (I have about 50 so far). You can download over 2000 ebooks with a 2GB card that comes with the E71. Nimbuzz messenger rocks like no other - you can simultaneously log in to facebook, gtalk, yahoo, skype, msn, twitter and other social networking groups. There is no lag time or bugs that keep you worried.  Google Maps are way better than Nokia maps, so I suggest you download Google and stop wasting time on Nokia. To begin with, Nokia maps can’t spell the names right. RaceChrono and Sportstracker are great to use GPS and track the number of kilometres you’ve jogged and walked every day.  Total Recall offers beep-free recording for $10. If you can’t pay, you can even download an ad-sponsored version of it, too. If the absence of a torch is bugging you, S60SpotOn makes your E71 light up like no other, and for free. Lastly, if you want a funky colour interface with all facilities and social networks in one place, nothing like Snaptu. And if  you want to download the entire Quran in its original form (Arabic), you can do that with uQuran. And the best part? Most of these applications are available on Nokia Ovi.

Enjoy!